The sorrow we feel when we lose a loved one is the price we pay to have had
them in our lives.
Sarah touched all our lives and so many more. Quoting from just a sample of
the many cards and messages we have received, the same comments recur:
‘an exceptional and inspirational person’, ‘she touched the hearts of everyone
she met’, ‘so strong, so brave’, ‘always a smile and a kind word’, ‘beautiful
inside and out’, ‘an inspiration’, ‘ a beautiful, humble person’, ‘always smiling’,
‘one of the kindest, most caring people I have ever known’, ‘a true inspiration’,
‘the most beautiful, kindest, happiest person’, ‘one of the strongest, but with a
heart of gold’. I could go on.
The common thread is simple: she was kind. She loved her family, all children
and animals – and not always in that order.
Sarah was born on 3rd December 1968 in Kent. As sisters we shared an idyllic
childhood with freedoms rarely seen today but which Sarah did her very best
to replicate with Jess, Charlie and Alice – ponies, dogs, the outdoors, mud and
bugs were essential elements of a typical day. We spent countless hours on our
childhood summer holidays exploring the nooks and crannies of rockpools at
Wembury Bay, armed with nets and buckets, catching, inspecting and releasing
the fascinating occupants. Many years later we revisited the same rockpools
with our own children and reminisced …until we were told off by a Rockpool
Warden – who knew there was such a thing? Apparently, we should have
signed up for a Rock Pool Ramble at the conservation centre.
When we weren’t in Devon, Sarah spent many summers staying with our
grandparents in the valleys of South Wales, playing out all day on the
mountainside with our cousins and paddling in the streams, returning home
soaking wet and suntanned. It was home from home and they were precious
times.
At home, she rode, was an active member of the Pony Club and represented
the school in show jumping, frightening us out of our wits jumping round huge
courses at Hickstead. She was also a girl guide and received her Queen’s Guide
award, a prestigious accolade reflecting accomplishment in service to others,
community action, outdoor challenge and leadership.
With such happy memories from childhood, it was not surprising that, after
deciding that she had had enough of formal education, Sarah moved to the
South West aged just 17 to become a working pupil in an event yard. The rest,
you could say, is history …
The first time Ian saw Sarah was across a stable yard.
These are his words:
We were off on a night out to say farewell to Mark Mingo who was off to tour
Australia. He had arranged for a group of us lads to collect the girls and head
on into the metropolis known as Exeter. Our normal mode of transport for a
night out back then in the mid 80’s was a Bedford rascal pick up with a cattle
box on the back. We’d taken calves to market in it on that Friday morning so
an extra good wash out was required that day. I’d put straw bales in the back
and covered them with bed sheets – off we go.
We arrived at the stables and walked into the courtyard, the girls were still
doing the final feeds. One especially caught my eye, maybe it was because her
long skirt was tucked into her knickers to stop it getting wet by the soaking wet
hay nets, but I think it was her smile as Mark called across the yard and she
turned and that huge warm smile beamed out. That was it, I was hooked.
At 18 years old, we had both found our partner for life, how very lucky we
were. But it took me 7 years before I plucked up the courage to ask Sarah to
marry me, it was February 14th 1993. Now, where I take my time, Sarah is the
complete opposite, she’d got the green light and we were married within 7
months, September 4th 1993.
20 months later Jessica joined us, and just 15 months later Charlie arrived. Our
family then became complete 4 years later when little Alice arrived in early
January. Sarah absolutely loved being pregnant, it was that maternal instinct
which she had for not just our own children but for so many others that you
have already heard about.
Holly has shared some of her memories :
She remembers Sarah’s soft heart for vulnerable creatures – something that
never changed: Once, when they were out hacking they came across a
bedraggled baby rabbit all wet in a puddle. Sarah, of course, dismounted, tucked the little creature in her jumper and rode home with it. She hid it in the airing cupboard and fed it until it was better before releasing it when it was
strong enough. One of many rescues over the years …
Like many of us, Holly will remember Sarah for her gems of wisdom,
knowledge, inspiration and encouragement and most of all courage.
Soon Sarah changed direction and became a nanny to the Saunders and Kelly
families – Big Alice fondly recalls trips to the zoo, singing all the way,
particularly, ‘We’re going to the zoo, zoo, zoo. You can come too, too, too..’
and happy times, generally outside, with Jodie the black lab and Mabel and
McTavish the Shetland ponies. McTavish, now aged 28, is still going
strong…ish.
Sarah was never happier than when surrounded by children – anyone who
attended her wedding to Ian in August 1993 will always remember the scene
reminiscent of the Sound of Music with a tumble of little bridesmaids dressed
in floral chintz. Jodie, McTavish and a sheep called Bob came too.
Unsurprisingly, it wasn’t long before Sarah and Ian had children of their own,
Jess, Charlie and Alice, and every moment she spent with them was a blessing.
She was a completely natural mother and nothing phased her. She continued
to teach riding and show ponies and in fact, nearly gave birth to Jessica at the
Devon County Show, refusing to leave the showground before the class was
over despite having regular contractions while standing at the ringside. We
have received lovely messages from the generations of East Devon Pony Club
children who benefited from Sarah’s patience and wisdom.
Her own girls’ riding achievements gave Sarah so much pleasure and wins at
the top shows came thick and fast. It was always hugely important to Sarah,
however, that the ponies’ welfare was paramount and that the girls were
polite and sportsmanlike – not always the case in the showing game. She has
passed that legacy to Jess who is now showing the youngstock that they bred
together.
As her own children grew up Sarah devoted her time to another generation by
becoming a Teaching Assistant at Rockbeare School, a job she loved. Especially,
she loved helping the children who needed extra support, showing them
limitless patience and love and taking huge pleasure from their progress.
After several years of mystery symptoms, Sarah was diagnosed with Motor
Neurone Disease in October 2012 and she fought it fiercely for over 8 years,
during which time she helped her children grow and thrive, each excelling in
their chosen field while she continued to guide, advise and encourage. She was
immensely proud of them all.
During this time Sarah was thrilled to welcome Raquel into the household and I
know that she, and for a while her niece and baby Zac, gave Sarah huge joy.
Raquel has shared her own thoughts and says:
The Please household is very much one with an open door policy. Welcoming everyone that
happens by. It is full of love, commotion and positivity but most importantly it is that of
inclusion. Sarah would always make sure that you were considered no matter how busy it
got. With the warmest smile and a “Hello Love” every morning, she could make you feel
worthy of this amazing love she radiated. That you were part of a secret club she had
founded. But what really made Sarah stand out was her kindness. Her natural ability to
perceive, understand and empathise without judgement or disregard. Connecting to people
on a level that made them feel seen, valued and accepted. And from the first day I met her,
she made me feel like I belonged. In her family, as her friend and beside Charlie. She will
always be an inspiration to me. Not because of how she held herself, carrying on in spite of
her condition, owning it and never letting it snub her light. But because she was a genuinely
good person with unwavering values. Raw and down to earth with a nurturing nature that
was generous, beautiful and selfless. I will forever be grateful for the time I had her in my life.
Shorter than I would have liked, but grateful nonetheless, to have known Sarah at all.
Raquel continues: I will remember Sarah in every bird I see; every child that smiles; every
sunny day that results in panda eyes; every Billy Joel song we hear; every sausage,
schnauzer and Bishon cuddle; every time I watch ‘4 weddings and a funeral’, and most
importantly, I will remember Sarah every time I hug her friends, her family, children and
Charlie.
Sarah and Ian celebrated their Silver Wedding in August 2018 and to celebrate
this and her 50 th birthday, they went on safari with Mum and Dad to Tanzania.
Precious memories were made and they all had the time of their lives.
I will close with some of Ian’s thoughts. Sarah often described Ian as her ‘rock’
and truer words were never spoken.
He says:
Sarah made it very easy to look after her. She never complained about
anything. She put up the most heroic fight against MND and managed to
prolong her life so as to leave three well rounded loving young adults, guiding
and educating us all over the years. The very high standards she set and
expected will live on through us forever.
She was still very much in charge of running the house, doing the weekly
shopping and ordering anything else anyone needed (or didn’t need but Sarah
thought they did). You only had to mention something in passing and Sarah
was on it, researching first then ordering and then enjoying us open the
numerous parcels that would arrive.
Ian continues: I feared that Sarah would suffer towards the end of the disease
but she didn’t. She wasn’t in pain whilst in hospital and passed away very
peacefully in my arms. I take great solace from this and hope you can also.
Family, children and animals. She was brave, she was patient and she was
beautiful, but most of all she was kind and we will all miss her.
